Monday, May 25, 2009

Busy Weekend...Busy Post and some MUCH Needed Advice!!

Hello Ladies!! I hope you all are having nice and relaxing Memorial Day weekend!!

Ours was wonderful. Busy but wonderful!! I actually got a jump start on my weekend a day early. Since, we had our daughter's High School Graduation last Thursday and we had planned on leaving to go camping Friday as soon as "Muscles" and "Big Daddy" got off of school and work. I took a vacation day to try to get e few things finished up Friday morning.

So, after "Miss Priss" and I took "Muscles" to school (or should I say...he took us. He got his driving permit last week so I let him drive. He is a pretty good driver!!)we headed to Wal-Mart to do some shopping for groceries, etc. that we needed for our camping trip. Then after bringing the stuff home and putting it away, I decided to take "Miss Priss" to lunch since she wasn't coming with us camping and so I could spend a little time with her.

But let me backtrack to the Graduation. OH MY!! It went so smoothly. Like I said in my previous post, I was SO proud of my baby girl!! So, was "Big Daddy". I think I even saw a tear or two!! And they weren't ALL from me...LOL!!

Seriously, where did the time go though?!?!? Like I have said too many times felt like it was just yesterday I was giving birth to that 7 lb. 15 oz. bundle of joy. OK...I am gonna stop before I cry even more. But here is a pic of ""Miss Priss" and her boyfriend (whom I like but am kinda mad with at the moment...I'll get to that later!!)

So, back to was such a nice trip. We went to a campground pretty close to home. With it being a holiday weekend we were kinda limited. But we had such a good time. Since, "Miss Priss" decided at the last minute she wasn't able to go with us, another LONG story. We told "Muscles" he could bring his buddy, Ben. Whom, my husband and I both adore. He is such a good kid...

We camped, rode bikes, fished and even made s'mores. You know all the things that go along with camping. I even did a little shopping. We have gone to this particular campground a few times and every time we pass this cute little shop that I have always wanted to stop at. The Crescent Moon. Well, this weekend was the weekend. And was I ever so happy. I was in love the moment I walked it. And the shop owners were two very warm and friendly ladies. I could of spent the whole day in there. But there was fishing to be done, so I tried to hurry. But I did a few things...

Like I said, it was such a nice and relaxing weekend. But of course it would not be a weekend in our house if there wasn't some sort of hiccup(AKA drama).

Well, let me explain something first. Katelyn (AKA "Miss Priss") has been dating the same boy for about 9 months now. And he is a nice enough kid BUT (I know the dreeded BUT) they NEVER want to spend anytime with us. NEVER!!! BUT they are ALWAYS with his family. Whether it being hanging out with his Mom and Step-Dad. Or going to his Dad's softball games. Heck, Katelyn has even met the ENTIRE family....I am talking Aunts, Uncles cousins, etc. on BOTH sides of the family. Yet we can't even get the kid to come over. EVER!!!

We have invited him over for dinner, out to dinner, etc. Heck, we even asked him to go camping with us this past weekend (under the conditions that he and "Muscles" sleep in a tent) And of course we got a big fat "NO!!". He had to work "all day". But yet, we agreed to let Katelyn go on a family vaction with them to Florida this coming 4th of July (which I am SERIOUSLY reconsidering!!!!!).

Anyway, back to my we are camping and all is well. Around 10:00am Saturday morning we get a call from Katelyn. Which, let me tell you is the crack o' dawn for that child!!! So, I am feeling good after her call. Too think that she called just out of the blue made me feel she was missing us. Well, during our phone call conversation I asked her if her and Matt wanted to drive up for the day and hang out with us (It was only 1/2 hour drive and Katelyn knew the way) but she said that it was rainging and that my Mom didn't want her driving. And that Matt had to work "all day" anyway. Which seemed reasonable!!

But you have to know my parents....I love them to death!!! But let's just say that my parents and I have two totally different parenting styles. My Mom thinks Ed and I are too strict. Seriously, they child comes and goes as she pleases. She has a 1:00am curfew and we even agreed to Florida. Are you kidding me!?!?!? But because we worry and care about Katelyn, we rather her not stay by herself while we are gone (out of her on safety) we are hard on her. WHATEVER!!! So, I should of known that whole "driving in the rain" thing was a lie.

Anyway, after our phone call conversation, I admit I was missing her so I called her back around noon whenever "Big Daddy", "Muscles" and Ben were gone fishing. But there was no answer, so I called my parents house and my Mom said that since it was raining (Raining!?!?!? What rain!?!?!?) and she didn't want her coming down there she let her go to the mall and out to lunch with Matt. (Matt!?!?!? I thought he had to work "all day") while talking to my Mom Katelyn beeped in. And when I said hello, I can barely hear her with all of the background noise. So, I ask her where they are and she says Eric and Denise's...which happenes to be our good friends and also friends of Matt's Mom and Step-Dad's. I am PISSED!!!! No, not pissed....HURT!!!!!!! I thought he had to work?!?!? So, I asked Katelyn that very same question she says..."til noon". ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!?!?!? I thought one of the reason they didn't come to meet us was because he had to work "all day". OK, I don't classify noon as "all day".

So after basically telling her that once again they ditched us for his family and how HURT I was, I hung up!!! So, I decided if she lied about him working "all day" I bet she AND MY MOM (mind you) lied about the rain so I called my best friend. Sure enough, it hadn't rained at all!!!!!! Just as I thought!!!

I am telling you girls, I was CRUSHED!!!!!!!!! Still am!!!!! She has been at work all day and I have not spoke to her since I hung up on her Saturday. Of course, I received a couple text messages within an hour of hanging up on her telling me that they would come down, etc. but we never did see them!! Go figure!!

So, what do I do!?!?!?!? Nothing my husband or I say gets thru to her anymore. She thinks because she is offically a High School Graduate and "almost" 18 that she should be able to come and go as she pleases with NO rules!!! All we want to is spend time with her (and the BF) and we get pushed aside ALL of the time for everybody and everything else!! And it hurts!!!!

Whenever "Big Daddy" and I try to talk to her she gets an additude and thinks we are being unreasonable. I am tired of fighting all of the time. I am tired of all of the tension. We are the parents....but why do I feel like I am the one being controlled by her!?!?!? I know she is spoiled...and we are the only ones to blame. But how do we make our points to her without coming off as being controlling or mean. Or her wanting to "move out"...oh yeah, that's the new one!!

Seriously, if the only thing she can complain about is us not letting her stay home alone whenever we go camping for the weekend (which is really for her safety more th n anything else) or that we want to spend time with her...then I think we are doing pretty well. So why do I always feel that nothing that my husband and I do is right in her eyes!?!?!?

OK, now I really am going to I better finish this post up. But I would appreciate any advice ya'll have to offer. Because quite frankly, I am at a lost at this point!!

Hugs!! Carrie


Mary @ Neat and Tidy said...

My heart goes out to you - been there and done that with my youngest, so I know just what you are feeling. On the bright side, she is now a terrific daughter and friend. I think it was once she got out of high school and started experiencing what life is really about that she realized I wasn't the two-headed goof she thought I was. I hope and pray this goes the same way for you. Hang in there.

saraonyx said...

I was once that child:( When I had just graduated and had just turned 18, I spent most of my time with my boyfriend. I thought I was an "adult", and should be able to do as I pleased. With my mom and I it did end up coming down to me moving out. My boyfriend and I moved in together. That lasted about 2 years. We were just too young. Now I am 32, my honey and I have been together for almost 10 years and we have a 7 year old daughter. No, this isn't the same guy. Of course, now I understand that my mom just wanted to keep me safe. She is also my best friend. Anyway, what's my point??!! I'm not sure, maybe just that in the end everything worked out for the best and maybe without all that I wouldn't be where I am now? I think that sometimes we (at least me) have to be allowed to make our own mistakes to learn the lesson we need to learn. I wish you luck, and dread the day when my daughter turns 18:)

Pam said...

Oh Carrie, I don't know what to tell you. This is a hard situation. I don't think you are to hard on her at all. I am thinking I would be doing something about the boyfriend if he doesn't have enough respect to come around you all. I was this kind of 18 year old too and I had to learn some lessons the hard way but now I adore my Mama and we are very close. I will be praying for you. Be strong.