Saturday Morning Ramblings!

Happy Saturday!! Don't you all just LOVE Saturdays?!?!? I know I do. It feels so good to wake up and know that I don't have anywhere that I HAVE to be...like work!! LOL!!

But today is still going to be busy...we have a benefit for a guy that my husband and I went to High School with. He was diagnosed with a Stage 3 Malignant Brain Tumor. And he is only 37....so, PLEASE keep in in your prayers!!

Then we have some errands to run, we are on vacation next week and we are taking the camper out. We are going to go to Meramec State Park and float down the river one day. And then we are going to vist the Meramec Caverns another. Which, I am looking forward to...hopefully it should be relaxing!! Even though, I am not the strongest swimmer, so I hoping the water to VERY calm!!

But thanks to my husbands truck, our daughter's car and the camper all getting broke into this past Thursday night (all while we were sleeeping) we have some extra errands that we need to run today. Like getting my husbands cell phone replaced, etc.

I will tell you what....I think it had to have been somebody that knows us. Because they knew EXACTLY what they were looking fo. They stole my husbands cell phone, our GPS, our good camera (the boys had just gone capming last week and since we were leaving again this weekend hubby decided just to leave it in the camper), my daughter's Ipod and dock, some tools out of the back of the truck and a 20 in flat screen TV we had in the camper.

But you know what, I am just happy that it wasn't worse. Like I said in my last post, I am trying to have a better attitude. Just trying to see the postitive and good and not the negative and bad. So, that was why I decided to "brighten" up my blog. A new look and a new attitude!!

Anyway, better run....lots to do. But if I don't talk to all of you before we leave....have an WONDERFUL weekend!! Hugs!! Carrie♥

My Baby...Is No Longer A Baby!!

Good Evening Ladies!! Just wanted to throw out another heartfelt thanks to everybody that has put up with my whining and crying lately.

I know that my last few posts have not been the most postive or uplifting and for that I want to apoligize. You all will be glad to know, that I have decided I am going to stop complaining and try to get back to my normal positive, upbeat self.

So, in saying that...I would like to share a few of the POSITIVE things that have been happening in my world in the past few weeks.

And one of those things was "Muscles" celebrating his 16th Birthday back on the 9th of July.
Look at him....look at my beautiful baby boy!?!?! And the best part is that he has a beautiful heart and personality to go along with it!!





Love ya "Muslces" more than life itself!! You make your Mama proud!! ♥

Hello

Hello Ladies!! Just wanted to stop by and tell you all thanks (again) for the advice on my thyroid. I have still not made it in to do the blood work yet. I have to fast for 12 hours prior to the test and with work, etc. I haven't found time yet. So, I am still unsure of the outcome. But I will let you all know!!

I know in my last post I had mentioned that one of the reasons my doctor originally had my thyroid tested was due to panic attacks. So, I was just wondering if any of you also suffer from panic attacks? And if so, what are some of your "coping techniques"? And with your panic attacks do you also suffer any phobias, etc.?

As weird as it sounds....I kind of have a fear (phobia) of taking medication (fear that they will trigger a panic attack). And I have to admit I am more worried about having to take mediacation for the thyroid than anything even being wrong with the thyroid itself.

I made the mistake of searching the internet for side effects of the medication and even though they said that there were very few, it did say that if somebody is given the wrong dosage that the medication could give symtoms of HYPERthyroidism and panic attacks and nervousness is one of those symtoms. And having a fear of meds anyway and now knowing that it could possibly increase my anxiety...I am scared to take them if need be!! WEIRD I know!!

I think I have been thru everything and anything that comes with panic attacks. And as embarrassing as they are....I decided now was a better time then ever to admit to you guys that I suffer from them.

So, I would to hear from you if you also suffer from them...but if any of you feel uncomfortable posting where everybody can see, please free to email me at southpaw8117@yahoo.com.

Hugs!! Carrie♥

When It Rains, It Pours.....

As the saying goes....when it rains, it pours. I just got back from the doctor's office. This afternoon was my appointment for my yearly physical. And I am not sure if I mentioned it but our Primary Care Physician has been out on Medical Leave due to Brain Cancer. I KNOW!!!! And he is only 40 YO. BTW, PLEASE add Dr. Schallert to your prayers!!

Anyway, needless to say I was a little nervous about seeing one of the other Doctors that have been helping out. But I was relieved, because the Doctor I saw today, seemed to be very good. Really seemed that he knew his stuff!! But, as he was looking thru my records, he noticed that Dr. Schallert had checked my thyroid back in 2005 due to some Panic issues I was having (and still have).

But, Dr. Warren told me today, that back then my test seemed to be "normal" but that since 2005 they have changed the "normal" range. So, he wants me to have it checked again (along with the normal yearly blood work) to see if I have an under active thyroid (Hypothyroidism). Even though it is usually an overactive thyroid (Hyperthyroidism) that causes Panic Attacks. Whereas mine seems to be under active....but he had asked a series of other questions regarding symptoms and unfortunately, a few of the questions I had to say "yes" to. So, now I am EXTRA nervous!!

I was just wondering if any of you are familiar with Hypothyroidism?!?!? And if so, what can you tell me?!?!? And what are the side effects to the medication, etc.!?!?!

Hugs!! Carrie♥

Tuesdays Thoughts

Hey there ladies!! Just wanted to stop by and tell all of you THANKS for all of the warm and caring comments you all left regarding my job. Things have been a little bit better. My supervisor has been trying to be nice lately, even though I am 110% sure it is more for other's benefit than mine. But heck, I will take what I can get!! LOL!!

I have decided that I am going to start looking for something else. Which, I am nervous about but I think it is a choice I need to make. Granted, I don't know how I feel about giving up my 4 weeks of vacation, etc. But sometimes, your happiness is worth it.

It still amazes me how many double standards there are out in the corporate world. As some of you may know, I work downtown St. Louis and with the All Star Game being held in St. Louis this year, things around my work building have been absolutely CRAZY the past few days. But it is funny that "the supervisor" has "snuck out" of work everyday this week so him and "the girlfriend" can join in all of the All Star festivities but yet nothing was said to him but yet we all have had to stay until our normal times and then sit in traffic for an hour more than normal.

Oh well, I have been doing so much "soul searching" the past few weeks and I have decided that I am not going to be negative anymore. That place is not worth my health. And ever since the other week, I have felt this overwhelming feeling of anxiety. And I have decided that I need to just start enjoying my life. That I am going to start trying to have a more positive attitude and not dwell on the negative.

Do any of you ever feel this way? That you are letting the negative things in life bring you down entirely too much? And if so, what do you do to stop yourself and start seeing the good in life?

Calgon Take Me Away!! Advice Needed....(again)!!

OH.MY.GOODNESS, girls!! Where to start!?!? So, much has happened since I last posted. I have done a little tweaking in the house, we finished the Koi pond and we had a Graduation party for "Miss Priss". Which I will be showing pics of all later. But this post is to vent, or maybe get some advice...not quite sure which.

Let me just start about two days ago when I was called into a meeting with my immediate supervisor, who let's just say is a complete JERK!!!!! I am not even exaggerating....let me put it this way, this is a man who was recently caught having an affair with his wife's best friend and who he has since left the wife (and two children I might add) for!! Not to mention who actually went on a family vacation with his family and the wife's best friend's family all the while the two of them were having an affair!!

Needless to say, this man has absolutely NO respect for woman...NONE whats so ever!! So, during our meeting he started getting very disrespectful towards me for no apparent reason, so I LOST it!!! I have worked for this company for 12 years and I have been in this same department for 11 of those 12. And I have NEVER been so mad. I actually told him that I QUIT and I walked out!! I got to my desk threw my security pass on my desk and told my co-workers that I QUIT!!

Of course, as soon as I got the parking garage and in my car I started BALLING!! I knew that I had made a major mistake but at the same time felt a great sense of relief! Not that I am the type of person to have ever done that but between work and home I guess I was at a major breaking point! As you are all aware of, my job is a HUGE source of my stress!! And my supervisor totally disrespecting me was the straw that broke the camel's back!!

The rest of that afternoon and evening I received several phone calls from co-workers, etc. asking me to reconsider and to come back. So, I did. Even after "Big Daddy" suggested that I take a month or two off of work and then try to look for something else. That he knew my job made me very unhappy lately and that he would support my decision 110%

Anyway, I went in yesterday and had a "formal" sit down with the immediate supervisor and both of our manager per their request. And let me say, it did not go well at all. Our manager was very compassionate and understanding but my supervisor was a complete A%$ He was actually yelling at me so loud that most of my co-workers heard and we were behind closed doors. But yet, I was the one that got a written warning for MY behavior (basically walking out the day before).

I will admit that I got so upset that I probably said a few things that I shouldn't of but I had had enough. But the way I see it, I am a human being and no matter if you are my friend, boss, etc. I still think you should show me some respect. And I will do the same....

Anyway, I guess this is where the advice comes in...I still have my job (thank goodness) but at the moment, I feel like I have very little self pride because I did go back!! So, if you all were in my shoes, would you tuck your tail between your legs, stay and just be thankful you have a job in these trying times?!?!? Or would you decide that your stress level, happiness and self-pride was more important and start to look for something else?!?!?